Writings

{This article was originally published on Hot Stove New York.}

Have I got a joke for you. Stop me if you’ve heard this one.

Frequently beleaguered New York sports franchise finds itself riding high for the first time in several years thanks to a superlative 2006 season, only to fall flat on its face in spectacular fashion the following year. Franchise suddenly finds itself in damage control mode, faced with an unexpectedly and extraordinarily pissed off fan base that no longer seems to be buying into the sham that ownership is shoveling. What’s worse, the franchise finds itself in enormous debt following the construction of their new billion dollar home, and the only way to recover that capital is by hitting said disgruntled fan base over their collective heads with staggering ticket prices.

But wait for the punch line.

The franchise needs a face. Not the face of a manager under fire, or a boy genius whose rose has lost its bloom. Not the face of a spoiled superstar who doesn’t hustle, or a worn down veteran who can no longer compete. The team needs a new face. A big face. A face that everyone knows. A face that’s already burnt into the nation’s consciousness because ESPN wouldn’t have it any other way. A face that dominates the front page, and a name that’s on everyone’s tongue, on every media outlet’s rumor mill, on every team’s radar, in every fan’s pipe dream.

Ladies and Gentleman, I’d like to introduce you to the newest New Yorker, Johan Santana! Er, I mean, Brett Favre. I mean, Santana. Favre, Santana, Favre, Santana.

Apologies, but my head is spinning. Must be a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when they change something.

Kudos to Jets owner Woody Johnson, who could hardly have orchestrated this grand charade any better. After all, it was a scant four days after the owner announced that the team would be charging its season ticket holders exorbitant Personal Seat License (PSL) fees in their new stadium that Gang Green dropped the F(avre)-Bomb. Now we can put to bed the questions concerning why the team’s partner in their new $1.6 billion stadium, the New York Giants, unveiled details of their PSL program in late June while the Jets remained tight-lipped about their 2010 plans, which will see fans paying one-time fees ranging from $500 to $150,000 for the privilege to buy a season ticket plan. Would it surprise anyone to learn that the PSL was a brain child of the cable company?

Yup, the Jets played this one to perfection, pilfering their subscribers’ pocketbooks while the pickings were good. They learned their lesson from the New York Mets, who in typical Flushing fashion, could not even execute their own greedy scheme properly. Believe me, the Wilpons are not an ownership group that enjoys watching Willie Randolph collecting paychecks for the remainder of his contract’s tenure while taking bows in Yankee Stadium. But the team was left with little option but to fire their skipper when they foolishly failed to coordinate their season ticket brochures with Santana’s arrival. Nice work by the marketing department, which seems to pump out more silly slogans for the team than you can shake a stick at, but failed to have the printing press hot at the franchise’s most critical juncture. Instead, the team had to sit on its 2009 seating chart and pricing tiers for half of the 2008 schedule. Think the Wilpons were happy to see that 10-game winning streak in July? Playoffs? That would just be the gravy.

No, the Jets would not repeat the same comedy of errors. And while the team has indicated that Favre’s likeness will “not be used to sell” PSLs, who’s kidding whom here? Jet fans don’t need to see Favre’s mug on a brochure when half of them are already wearing his number on their backs.

And Woody Johnson saw everything that he had made, and, behold, it was very good. And there was training camp and there was preseason, and on the seventh day, he rested. He blessed the seventh day and hallowed it, because Woody knew the financing for his stadium had been secured the day Johan Santana walked in the door.

I mean, Brett Favre.

{This article was originally published on Hot Stove New York.}

How ironic. In a move to throw a bone to an angry fan base, Mets ownership paints the bull’s eye squarely on their own classless and clueless faces. Fred, Jeff, congratulations: You are well on your way to cementing your legacy as the most beloved baseball executives in New York since Walter O’Malley.

After enduring weeks upon weeks of Willie Watch, which grew to a crescendo over the weekend when SI.com’s Jon Heyman reported on Friday that Willie and/or his coaching staff could be out of work as soon as that evening, Mets management allowed their manager a Father’s Day split and even paid his plane fare to Los Angeles - how generous - before dispatching GM Omar Minaya to finally mercifully (mercilessly) lower the ax…in a hotel room, at 3 a.m., following a 9-6 road victory over the AL West division-leading Angels. You can’t make it up. You can’t even wrap your mind around it. It’s mindless, it’s senseless, and it stinks like shit.

This morning on MetsBlog.com, Matt Cerrone writes that he is “convinced information was intentionally leaked to the media [last week] in an effort to force Omar Minaya’s hand.” If Matt’s suspicions are correct - and I trust his instincts here - then what else can be said? Words fall short. Disingenuous? Gutless? Classless? None of them do this situation justice.

Pig vomit. That’s how I’d describe it. Putrid, stinking pig vomit.

In the last ten months this franchise has engineered a collapse of historic proportions, invested $150 million in a pitcher scouts believe is on the back end of his career, completely bungled and jeopardized the health of their top performer this season, and now, this.

And make no mistake, this is entirely about 2007. Because Jeff Wilpon wanted blood after the way last season ended, and Omar Minaya was able to protect and insulate his manager. But in the end, Jeff got his way, and we shouldn’t have expected anything less from a middle-age brat choking on his father’s money.

So there you have it. The Mets are a disgrace. A Mickey Mouse organization, as Wayne Gretzky once famously called the Jersey Devils. So, have at it, Yankee fans. My brethren and I are at your mercy - and Scott Kazmir is no longer the low point of our fandom.

{This article was originally published on Hot Stove New York.}

I’m not a doctor. I’m not even a science major. But I’m a sports fan, and a hockey fan, and over the years I’ve picked up a nugget or two concerning head injuries and the impact of post-concussion syndrome.

The NHL as a league took a long, hard look at head injuries in their sport right around the time that superstar Eric Lindros was clearly losing his battle with the recurring condition - a condition that had already forced his younger brother out of hockey. It’s no coincidence that the league stood up and took notice when Lindros’ career seemed in jeopardy. After all, the NHL had billed Lindros as the next to grasp the baton handed from Gordie Howe to Wayne Gretzky and later Mario Lemieux, much in the same way that the league is currently marketing Sidney Crosby. Nobody cared that Brett Lindros would never play again, but once Eric was felled it was time to take a look at just what exactly we had been doing to these athletes’ brains.

But this isn’t about the NHL. This is about Major League Baseball, and specifically the way the Mets have handled Ryan Church’s latest concussion, his second in three months. Baseball has never had an Eric Lindros. Superstars lost to the stigma of PEDs, yes, but never to head injury. Still, you would think that someone amongst the team’s medical staff would know a sliver of what the NHL has uncovered about concussions since they began to investigate the injury. You would think someone, anyone within the Mets organization would have at least a cursory knowledge of the NHL’s battle with the injury and the measures they’ve taken to erase it from their game.

It is absolutely absurd that only after meeting with a neurologist on Tuesday has the team decided that it’s in Church’s best interest to “stay home, rest and pretty much stay out of the light, daylight,” as GM Omar Minaya told the media yesterday. Church has been suffering from headaches and dizziness since taking a knee to the head from Atlanta’s Yunel Escobar last week, yet despite these tell-tale symptoms of post-concussion syndrome, Church was allowed to travel with the team to Denver and back home, and has even been called upon to pinch-hit on four occasions since the injury. On a recent SNY broadcast, play-by-play man Gary Cohen indicated that Church did not even recall the hit he recorded in the first of those pinch-hit appearances.

Honestly, the negligence is mind-boggling, and it is magnified 10-fold by the fact that Church has now suffered two concussions in three months, and entered Tuesday night’s game tied for the team lead in homers (9), runs (34), and second in RBI (32). It’s nice to see the franchise protecting its assets.

For the record, the NHL would not have allowed Church to travel, practice, or even workout until he was completely symptom-free. Neurologists and concussion specialists have advised the league that any sort of exercise, exertion, or exposure to light and sound can worsen a concussion and/or prolong its effects. They have also learned that each successive head injury tends to be worse than the last, and that with every concussion suffered, the likelihood of a complete recovery decreases. Just ask former Rangers Jeff Beukeboom and Mike Richter, both of whom had their careers ended due to concussions, and both of whom suffered from fatigue and sensitivity to light for years following their injuries.

The NHL had to learn the hard way, and the Mets appear determined to take that route as well. I just hope it doesn’t cost anyone their career.

{This article was originally published on Hot Stove New York.}

You can almost see the high-water mark for the New Mets - that place where the wave finally broke and rolled back. It was a highlight reel catch from Endy Chavez in Game 7 of the the 2006 NLCS, and the orange and blue have receded ever since.

Whether or not you believe this team has been dragged down by the bad karma of 2007, let’s agree that this team stinks.

The lowlight for me? Hearing the loudmouths in the dwindling Shea crowd chant “Fire Willie” during the game’s final innings.

So Knicks fans have abandoned the hardwood and shown up en masse at the ballpark? Is that what we’ve sunk to in Flushing? Is it idiocy, ignorance? It smells a little bit.

And speaking of smells, how has Omar come out smelling like a rose through all of this? His parachuting act into Colorado was clearly brilliantly deployed; and thank goodness for an injury to Marlon Anderson or we might still be fielding infielders in the outfield. With a career-long platoon player in one corner and an oft-injured 41-year-old in the other, what exactly was Plan B in the corner outfield spots? Angel Pagan? Fernando Tatis? Ricky Ledee was unavailable, I presume.

I’m an Omar fan, but fair is fair. How exactly Willie Randolph has earned the status of poster boy for this group’s underachievement is beyond my understanding. Fans think Aaron Heilman is a bum, fans think Carlos Delgado is a bum, fans think Luis Castillo is a bum, fans think Carlos Beltran is a bum. With all these bums, it’s amazing Willie wins any games at all.

As far as I’m concerned, the bloom is off the rose for this entire baseball operations, and that includes the players, coaches, management and ownership. Willie did not conduct himself with much class or composure this past week, but the Wilpons accomplished nothing by dragging their embattled manager in front of them this morning and calling a press conference to announce the man won’t be fired. Didn’t we go through this in the offseason?

Poor Willie, forced to sit though his own very merry unresignation.

Omar spoke of putting past events behind and moving forward, but that’s little consolation for a manager whose job status is no more secure than it was yesterday, and whose team fell 6.5 behind the front-running Marlins tonight.

{This article was originally published on Hot Stove New York.}

Remember that note about it never being easy to embarrass the Yanks in the House o’ Ruth? Scratch that. Evidently it’s very easy.

And with our perspective thus properly adjusted, I suppose it comes as no surprise that during a day-night doubleheader in Atlanta on Tuesday the Mets looked little different than the desperate and pathetic crew that stumbled into Yankee Stadium over the weekend and somehow came out with a two-game sweep. Let’s give a hand to those Amazin’ Mets, who emerged from the Bronx with a rare dose of goodwill and handed it all right back in one afternoon, losing by scores of 6-1 and 6-2, dominated in humiliating fashion by Tom Glavine in the first half of the twin bill and hours later falling to Jorge Campillo, making just his 2nd big league start and his first since 2005.

Some might ask where this sort of performance out of Glavine was when the Mets needed it on the last day of the ‘07 season. To Hell with that. I want to know where the Mets were on May 20th, 2008, when the team needed a strong effort against a dominant home team and didn’t bother to show up.

And no, Willie, these thoughts aren’t racially motivated. They’re motivated by the fact that your ballclub is putrid.

Speaking of Willie and his comments on race and SNY, here’s how I feel about it: They are paranoid and cowardly remarks from a man for whom I had a great deal of respect prior to reading his delusional rant. No matter how I felt about Wille the Manager, I’ve always respected Willie the Man. Now? I don’t know how I feel.

It’s worth noting that were the Wilpons to wake up and fire Willie today, there would be an outcry that a black manager had been axed on the heels of speaking out against “the man.” It would be impossible to fire the guy now without the race card starring front and center. And imagine if they brought a white guy in here to run the ship? We’d never hear the end of it.

If any of this factored into Willie’s thinking, if he at all hoped to buy himself some time by tying his owners’ hands, well, shame on Willie. He’s less of a man than I thought.

However, I’m speculating now, and for the time being, let’s give Willie the benefit of the doubt. Let’s assume his remarks were not motivated by self-preservation. Regardless of his intent, I think we can all agree that getting steamrolled by the Braves in the wake of these comments is not exactly a ringing endorsement for the manager.

When asked for his thoughts on all of this controversy, Ryan Church gazed curiously into space with glassy eyes and a blank, uncomprehending expression.

In case you missed it, the nightcap of the doubleheader concluded on a game-ending double play in which Church got absolutely wrecked trying to break up the play at second base. Braves shortstop Yunel Escobor completed the play and drop-kicked Church in the process. The Mets are calling the injury a “mild concussion,” but as mlb.com’s Marty Noble states, “there’s no such thing as a mild concussion less than three months after another concussion.”

And on that note, I think it might officially be time to throw optimism out the window. Perhaps that other shoe has finally dropped. The Mets would be absolutely lost without the contributions of Ryan Church this season, and Willie Randolph might already be out of a job without his stud rightfielder. I’m not sure I can envision this team remaining competitive (if you can call it that) without Church in the lineup.

No Church means Luis Castillo is your everyday No. 2 hitter. No Church means Carlos Delgado hits no later than sixth in this lineup. No Church means Delgado will hit as high as fifth on days when Moises Alou is off or injured. No Church means, yes Joe, this team is toasted.

And so is the manager.

{This article was originally published on Hot Stove New York.}

9:29
Yep, so we’re giving this Live Blogging thing a try. Considering how jazzed we are about today’s hearing, it seemed an appropriate time to jump in the pool.

9:40
Whoa, things are getting started in a hurry. According to ESPN’s T.J. Quinn, in exchange for being excused from today’s hearings, Andy Pettitte signed a new affidavit in which he confirmed knowledge that Clemens had used human growth hormone.

9:48
While we wait…
Today in the Journal News, Derek Jeter is disappointed in how this has all played out, and thinks the fallout will affect Pettitte’s season.

And some more on Pettitte’s sworn affidavit in which he states that Clemens admitted to HGH use.

9:55
ESPN’s legal expert doesn’t like the idea that Pettitte suddenly remembers further details on his own and Clemens’ HGH use. For someone who we’re constantly hearing is such a good, honest, and God-fearing man, Andy’s gotten himself tangled up in quite a web of deceit.

10:05
Jeez, the evidence is staring us in the face. Melon head, brontosaurus neck - and that’s just Debbie Clemens.

10:06
And we’re off!

10:10
Chairman Henry A. Waxman says Mitchell’s report is both “impressive and credible.” Oh, in that case I guess we can all go home. Except you. You stay right here and keep refreshing your browser.

10:12
Waxman seems like he’s planning on rambling on for a while. Do I have time for a beer run? What? It’s after 10…

10:14
Knoblauch confirmed all of McNamee’s claims against him - not sure if that was known previously. Pettitte confirmed his own use as well, of course, which we already knew. Waxman is commending both for their candor and cooperation…unlike some people.

10:17
Alright, now Waxman is calling Pettitte “a role model on and off the field” for his cooperation with the committee. Now hold on, he did cheat, right? Maybe I missed something. I could’ve sworn he cheated…

10:18
Waxman’s got the perfect mug for something like this. He’s almost daring you to keep a straight face. Clemens stare is plainly lost in the Chairman’s nostrils.

10:22
Waxman’s trashing McNamee for withholding evidence until recently, and not telling the whole truth, clearly questioning the witness’s credibility. He goes on to praise Clemens for his generosity and charitable work. I have a feeling there’s a big BUT coming however…

10:27
Boy was there ever. Roger, you’re a great guy, BUT…here’s a laundry list of inconsistencies, inaccuracies and flat-out lies in your testimony. Evidently McNamee actually allowed Clemens’ attorneys to interview him concerning the information he had provided Mitchell PRIOR to the release of the report. They know this because the conversation was secretly recorded (Take that, Rog!). Clemens has always claimed he had no knowledge of his inclusion in the report until its release.

10:30
Didn’t take long for Debbie Clemens to get dragged into this. Andy claims that Roger told him about his own HGH use (Mrs. Pettitte backs her hubby’s recollection), while Roger claims Andy is mistaken and that he only told his friend about his wife Debbie’s HGH injections. Sounds like Operation: Get Behind the Wifey.

10:36
I’m wondering, who recommended the haircut for Rog? Nothing says credibility like a skinhead.

10:37
Rog is telling us a bit about his childhood and upbringing now. We’re here to get to know each other after all. It’s like eHarmony, except on Capitol Hill.

Note: He’s not just a ballplayer, he’s a human being.

10:40
Roger asks, “How can you prove a negative?” It’s a fair question. I have no smart remark.

10:42
Could there be a starker physical contrast between Brian McNamee and Roger Clemens? I mean, look at this guy. If possible, his haircut is worse than Roger’s.

10:45
More unintelligible: Clemens’ Texas drawl or McNamee’s New York mouth full of dirty socks? Anyway, Mac now says he never trusted Clemens, which is why he saved evidence.

10:47
McNamee confirms that his tipping point was the secretly tape recorded conversation between he and Clemens that Roger later played at a live press conference. That’s when the gloves came off. Nice.

10:49
Clemens agrees that Andy Pettitte is no liar. No surprise there. In fact, I think I heard somewhere that he’s honest and God-fearing…

10:51
Now Congressman Cummings is reading quotes from Andy Pettitte that Waxman already read at the start. Time for that beer run?

10:53
This Clemens character’s got some shifty eyes.

10:58
Cummings is now reading the affidavits by Pettitte and his wife. Clemens breaks down in tears and admits to everything. No, no, he’s sticking by his position that Andy clearly misremembers or misunderstood.

11:00
Just saw the text Andrew Pettitte Affidavit. Heh, heh…Andrew.

11:03
Pettitte and McNamee both recollect a conversation in which McNamee became angry when he learned that Clemens had confided in Pettitte about his HGH use, because the information was supposed to be confidential.

11:09
Evidently Mike Stanton noticed Clemens bleeding through his “designer pants” and subsequently Roger carried around band-aids for his butt…according to McNamee. So where’s Mike Stanton when you need him? Maybe the committee should’ve pushed the hearing back another month to track him down.

11:14
Ah, the Canseco barbeque. McNamee says Clemens was there, Canseco supports Clemens’ claim that he wasn’t. Of course, Canseco’s also pretty desperate for money at the moment. Just saying…

Debbie Clemens is prepared to testify under oath that Roger Clemens never ever attends barbeques.

11:16
They’re now asking Clemens how long on average it takes him to play a round of golf. Clearly the fate of our youth hinges on that question.

11:23
You can tell the committee is very impressed by Clemens…because they keep saying so. McNamee, on the other hand, comes across as somewhere between a vole and a worm. You would think members of Congress would have been more mindful of not getting caught up in the persona of one of the more larger-than-life figures in professional sports. Inviting him into their offices for autograph sessions probably wasn’t the best idea…

11:27
Clemens is being pressed on some inconsistencies in his testimony. Roger leans back for some whispered consultation from his attorney and the room is immediately on fire with flash bulbs and camera clicks. High drama.

11:31
Debbie Clemens is much more attractive in person than in her Sports Illustrated shoot. Aside from her washboard abs, it’s not a flattering photo.

11:36
Dan Burton wants Brian McNamee’s blood.

11:39
Burton’s right that McNamee has lied an awful lot. McNamee is fighting an uphill battle to establish his credibility. Burton, though, is wrong to bring up quotes that McNamee may have delivered to various news outlets digging for information on Pettitte and Clemens following the Jason Grimsley affidavit. What did he expect? For McNamee to sell out his clients right then and there? Refusing comment to a journalist is very different from lying under oath - though incidentally, McNamee’s done that as well.

11:45
Ah, and now for the topic on everyone’s minds: Butt abscesses.

11:45
Whoa, I was only joking, but it sounds like there might be something to this butt abscess stuff. According to an MRI obtained by the committee, the injury was not caused by muscle strain, but rather “likely related to the patient’s prior attempted intramuscular injections.” And while the injury could have been caused by B12 injections, it was the opinion of the medical examiner that the injury was more consistent with complications from a steroid injection. It’s only this one guy’s opinion, however, and Clemens has medical records that support his B12 claim.

11:47
Haha, one of Clemens’ weasel attorneys just tried to address the floor in response to these medical records, only to be shot down. Apparently the rules of the hearing allow for witnesses to consult their attorneys, but do not allow for the attorneys themselves to address the committee.

12:04
Update: They’re still discussing Roger’s buttocks.

12:10
Not sure how Father Time found his way into the room, but he found himself a mic and is now grilling Charles P. Scheeler, who worked closely with Senator Mitchell on his report on steroids. Scheeler’s here largely to place a body between Clemens and McNamee. I’m not sure he expected to speak at all today - seems a bit rattled.

12:13
There is shouting coming from another room and an alarm or buzzer of some sort can be heard in the background. I think the nation might be under attack. McNamee seems understandably unnerved as he tries not to wet himself on national television.

12:15
Congressman Mica is asking what color the different steroids are, evidently trying to determine what exactly was in his protein shake this morning. It’s a shame that as a society we seem to have done away with the guy waiting off-stage to drag people off with a cane. Mica seems a prime candidate.

12:18
Congresswoman Maloney’s eyelids don’t appear to open fully. I thought at first she was talking in her sleep. I wonder if she cultivates this look, or if there’s a good reason for it and I’m in poor taste for bringing it up. Clemens seems torn between staring at Maloney’s eyelids or Waxman’s humungous nostrils.

12:22
Speaking of Waxman’s nostrils, it would seem like a fun game to see who could shove that largest object up the Chairman’s nose. I’m staring at a fairly large grape that I’m confident I could wedge up there with room to spare.

12:24
Uh oh, looks like Congressman Souder actually read the depositions. It’s always a shock when these politicians show up for work prepared.

12:28
Souder has experience in narcotics and sees a ton of similarities here. Unlike Congressman Burton, Souder sees the inconsistencies between McNamee’s earlier statements and his deposition as extremely consistent with drug dealers he’s dealt with. These witnesses seem to surrender only enough information to save their own skins until some event ticks them off and prompts them to spill the whole beans - in this instance, the recorded phone call between Clemens and McNamee.

12:31
Clemens says he didn’t have a car in high school so he ran home. And his mother worked three jobs. And we should believe everything he says.

12:35
Missed the name, but one congressman just asked what uniform Clemens will wear to the Hall of Fame. First of all, the correct question would be, which hat, not which uniform. Secondly, the guy’s not going to the Hall - haven’t you been paying attention? And thirdly, get a job.

Souder also urges us all to read the deposition of Chuck Knoblauch, whom he says spoke passionately about coming clean for the sake of his family. I haven’t read the deposition myself, of course, but I’d urge others as well. I certainly plan on it.

12:38
Waxman on several occasions says the committee sought out Clemens’ nanny during the time period of the Canseco barbeque in order to corroborate McNamee’s claim that Clemens attended the gathering. Clemens and Co. were not very cooperative and the committee wasn’t able to reach the nanny until Monday. Waxman’s nostrils look pissed.

12:41
Bombshell time. The nanny confirms that she remembers a party at Canseco’s during the time period is question and also that she recalls that Roger, Debbie, and the kids all attended the party. When the nanny spoke to the committee, she informed them that Clemens invited her to his home on Sunday prior to forwarding her information to the committee on Monday, spoke to her about the time in question, and subjected her to an interview by his attorneys. Clemens’ legal team is now standing and practically yelling at the Chairman. There’s even some finger wagging going on. It’s about time for some fireworks.

12:45
What’s with this “out of time” crap? Things were just getting good, and now we’re on to the next topic? This NannyGate stuff has some real potential!

12:52
15-minute recess! Now I think it’s time for that beer run. Let me know if I miss anything.

1:07
Just flipped over to Mike and the Mad Dog for a moment. Francesa is embarrassed for Congress that the hearing seems to have broken so clearly along party lines with Republicans looking to pound McNamee and Democrats looking to pound Clemens, who of course is a Republican from Texas with ties to President Bush. Chris Russo meanwhile just called Congressman Burton an idiot or clown, or some other derisive label. I have to agree.

On a related note, I’m upping the ante on the Nostril Game. I think I can squeeze Russo’s schnoz up one of Waxman’s nostrils. Beat that!

1:16
It seems 15-minutes in Congress really means half an hour. Think Roger’s fled the scene? I shouldn’t kid; the dedication of these men is admirable. I’ve had to pee four times since this thing started. I think my going problem might be a growing problem.

1:21
Did Congressman Davis just say the nanny’s name is Lily Strane? Strame? Did I mishear that? I thought we were concealing her name to protect her privacy…

1:33
Man, a 30-minute recess really sucks the energy out of a room. I think McNamee just dozed off.

1:38
Okay, here we go. Clemens is getting all hot and bothered because he feels Senator Mitchell didn’t make a good-faith effort to contact him prior to the release of the report. He says he’s a public figure easily tracked down, and that the former President of the United States found him in a deer-blind in South Texas when he needed to get ahold of him…which I don’t think really is the best example. I mean, where else would he be?

1:43
Congressman Braley wants to know if Clemens is a vegan. Clemens doesn’t know what that is. Score one for Clemens. I see what Francesa was saying about the party lines. Braley’s a Democrat and he’s chosen to go after Clemens for his use of B12, because not everyone thinks it’s the wisest thing to inject without a distinct medical need such as a severe vitamin deficiency. The injection, however, is legal and common in the game…so why the heck is this guy wasting our time?

1:46
Congressman Darrell E. Issa (R) says PHD sounds like it stands for “Pile it Higher and Deeper.” Funny. Issa’s mother used to take B12 injections, and as a result, he seems to think Braley’s a bit of a dunce. I’m no redneck, but I agree with the Republican congressman from California.

1:52
Now congressmen are just repeating questions that other congressmen have already asked. It should be noted that members of the committee have been leaving throughout the hearing in order to take place in various votes taking place on the floor, which could be a reason why no one appears to be listening to anything anyone else is saying. Or perhaps this is just how things get done in Washington. I wouldn’t know, I’m a nihilist.

2:02
When John F. Tierney talks I keep hearing Mayor Quimby. Is it just me? And is it a coincidence that he’s a Democrat from Massachusetts named John F.?

2:08
Missed the name again, but a congresswoman (I’m a guessing a Republican) just whipped out photos of Clemens dating back to 1996 in which he looked physically comparable to the way he appeared in the subsequent years in question. Now Roger’s talking about how great he is and how stupid people were for indicating he was in the “twilight” of his career at the end of his time in Boston. Yawn.

2:19
The congresswoman in question was Virginia Foxx, and yes, she’s a Republican. Now she’s ripping the Mitchell Report.

2:21
Waxman just had to lay down the gavel on this Foxx lady. What’re the odds that someone throws a chair by the end of this thing? 40-60? 50-50? Either way, I’ll take it.

2:23
I was having a bit of fun just there, but I do sympathize with Ginny Foxx, and it goes back to what I said before. What’s with this “out of time” crap? How do you make any progress on anything when no one’s allowed to see a point through to its conclusion? It’s like channel surfing - there’s lots of information to process, but I have no idea what’s going on.

2:25
Congressman Elijah Cummings decides to bring Andy Pettitte back into the debate. “You’re one of my heroes,” says Cummings to Clemens. “But it’s hard to believe you.” Roger seemed to waver for a moment at that. Is it possible that we could see tears by the end of the day?

2:36
McNamee just got an opportunity to get on a soap box and talk about how the Mitchell Report only scratches the surface of the problem in baseball, and there remains a dire need to educate people about the dangers and consequences of performance enhancing drugs. A nice way to conclude for the trainer who’s been painted in an extremely unflattering light all day.

2:40
They’re wrapping up now as Waxman delivers his final statement. The Chairman just had to deliver the second gavel stomp of the day in order to quiet Clemens, who once again attempted to defend himself against the implications of Andy Pettitte’s affidavit. Waxman also took the opportunity to apologize to McNamee for the way that he’s been treated by some members of the committee today, which was kinda unnecessary in my opinion for the Democratic congressman. We’re making friends with Brian McNamee now?

2:45
You’re still here? It’s over. Go home.

{This article was originally published on Hot Stove New York.}

More than 80 current and former Major League players are cited as alleged users of performance-enhancing drugs in Senator George Mitchell’s report on steroid use in baseball. The investigation’s key witnesses include Brian McNamee, a former Yankee strength trainer, and Kirk Radomski, a former Mets clubhouse attendant. Both men cooperated with the probe under pressure from the federal government, and as a result of their New York ties, the information they provided reflects particularly poorly on both New York franchises.

For the Yankees, current Yankees Andy Pettitte and Jason Giambi have been tainted by the report’s findings, as well as former Yanks Roger Clemens, Gary Sheffield, Mike Stanton, Chuck Knoblauch, Kevin Brown, Denny Neagle, Jason Grimsley, Ron Villone and David Justice. For the Mets, while the team’s current roster has largely escaped untarnished, the recently departed Paul Lo Duca is a featured case study in the report, while former Mets Todd Hundley, Todd Pratt, Mo Vaughn, David Segui, Matt Franco, and Lenny Dykstra figure prominently as well.

While the players listed above represent quite an eclectic group of stars and scrubs, you may have noticed that what they don’t represent is a whole lot of diversity. Amidst a sea of familiar faces, the faces of Miguel Tejada, Jose Guillen, Benito Santiago, and Fernando Vina stand out. They are part of only a small handful of Latino players that appear on Senator Mitchell’s list of cheats, and comprise approximately 5 percent of the athletes exposed today (depending on the list you’re consulting), despite the fact that as of 2005 nearly 30 percent of Major League players were Latino.

Does this mean that Americans are more inclined to juice than their Southern neighbors? Of course not. In fact, there are indications that just the opposite may be true given the density of Latino surnames that have popped up in drug violations since the instatement of MLB’s stringent testing policy in 2005. Just as we can logically conclude that the NY-centric clientele of Radomski and McNamee is not an accurate representation of an affliction that clearly spans coast-to-coast, likewise the niche that these petty peddlers had carved for themselves is surely not the beginning and end of baseball’s illegal drug trade.

The fact of the matter is that if a Latino player is interested in using steroids, there is little reason for that player to seek those substances in the United States when it is readily available in his native country at half the cost and without the paper trail. Pharmaceutical regulations are looser in places such as Venezuela and the Dominican Republic. Various steroids can be purchased over-the-counter and substances banned in the U.S. are frequently ingredients in legal supplements sold in Latin America.

In fact, in May 2007 Red Sox slugger David Ortiz notably told the Boston Herald that he has no way of knowing whether or not he unwittingly ingested a banned substance in his youth since he used to regularly buy protein shakes in the D.R. with little to no regard for the ingredients. Now Ortiz says he doesn’t even dare visit a GNC back home for fear of what he could be purchasing.

“I tell you, I don’t know too much about steroids, but I started listening about steroids when they started to bring that sh*t up,” Ortiz told the Herald. “I started realizing and getting to know a little bit about it. You’ve got to be careful.”

So while it comes as some surprise that so many members of the ‘99-2000 Yankees made the Senator’s list, it should surprise no one that the most notable Met name attached to the scandal is that of the recently jettisoned Lo Duca. I mean, who were you expecting? Ramon Castro? Carlos Delgado? Ambiorix Burgos? Surely not. With a roster that is a whopping 54% Latino as it stands today, the pickings were slim.

Given what we know, it is a virtual certainty that we will never see any sort of comprehensive list of who’s been naughty and who’s been nice. However, in the instance of the Mets, it was better to be lucky than good.

{This article was originally published on Hot Stove New York.}

There are several phrases that we as Americans tend to toss around with reckless abandon, using them as blanket defenses against tough questions and even tougher answers. “Innocent until proven guilty” is one such phrase - a sentiment embedded in the country’s vernacular that, shockingly, doesn’t solve all our problems. It’s this phrase that Commissioner Bud Selig invoked in his recent statements concerning Barry Bond’s pursuit of Hank Aaron’s career home run record, hiding behind the words rather than voicing an opinion that is etched across his grimace at each crack of the slugger’s bat. It’s a sentiment that many have expressed, embracing the warm comfort of a nation’s mantra rather than facing the reality of a situation wherein the most sacred record in sports has been broken by a known cheater.

I say “known” because I prefer to keep my head well above the stifling blindness of the sand. I understand that while this country was founded on certain principles, they were written down by men of reason, and therefore were not meant to be read and interpreted without the influence of our own reason. For surely every murderer caught red-handed is not innocent in the eyes of his captors until a court of law vouches for his guilt. Clearly the public did not presume the innocence of a man like O.J. Simpson given the furor that erupted in the wake of his acquittal.

I don’t mean to compare Barry Bonds to the likes of murderers and thieves. I mean only to explain that the concept of innocence without legally-binding guilt is not one that I can embrace. Why should any one forestall their own verdict in the absence of that of a jury? Aren’t juries, after all, compiled of people like you and I? People that are asked for their opinion, and asked to make a decision. If we were in the shoes of that jury, we couldn’t very well say, “I’m sorry, Your Honor, I can’t condemn this man. He’s innocent until proven guilty.”

In short, I, like many fans, believe Barry Bonds cheated baseball, using anabolic steroids to promote unnatural protein synthesis, increasing his muscle mass while reducing the effects of wear, tear, and perhaps most importantly, fatigue on a 40-year-old’s body. I believe that perhaps as many as 50% of all major league ball players were using in the mid-to-late 90s, that Roger Maris remains the single-season home run king, and that many of the heros of my youth may one day be tainted by the same spectre that now hangs over McGwire, Sosa, and Bonds. So be it. It is too late to change history and restore the record books, but it is not too late to proceed forward with open eyes. I, for one, choose not to perpetuate the cycle by continuing to ignore something that’s staring me, mockingly, in the face.

If the glove fits, Barry.